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  My God! Awful Christian Lyrics for Halfway Decent Rock Songs
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Posted by Syrah Merlot on 2001/02/01 01:55:31 US/Eastern

Christian rock generally really sucks. This website is even worse...really amateurish lyrics meant to be sung to popular tunes. How bad are they? Check out "Jesus is a Cool Dude" sung to the tune of "We Will Rock You." Or I dare you to try to sing "The Alternative to Hell" to the tune of "Heartbreak Hotel." This one's worth laughing and pointing at, for heathen, infidel and true believer alike.http://www.ultranet.com/~mari/


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Re: My God! Awful Christian Lyrics for Halfway Decent Rock Songs
by Rebecca on 2001/02/01 12:21:04 US/Eastern

Hell for me would be having to listen to any one of these songs being sung. People actually sit around thinking up these lyrics?? Amazing.

"Smells like Holy Spirit" and "Prayin'in the Classroom" are two of my personal favorites.

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  • Re: My God! Awful Christian Lyrics for Halfway Decent Rock Songs
    by Erin Barrett on 2001/02/01 12:41:52 US/Eastern

    Hey Rebecca, Did you catch the actual wave file of a group called the Newbies? They're singing their classic hit "Catch the Way." That's right; you guessed it: Sung to the tune of "Catch the Wave." In one word: Ouch.

    Also of interest is the "hymn" section. Not only are secular songs and TV lyrics fair game, but it seems taking classic hymns and rewriting them is also a way to show your True Christian Colors (Hey! Watch out Cindy Lauper!). The (was it Gilbert's or Sullivan's) old fav "Onward Christian Soldiers," now sings as "Retreat Christian Soldiers."

    Why would you want to do this, exactly?

    Erin

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    • Re: My God! Awful Christian Lyrics for Halfway Decent Rock Songs
      by Rebecca on 2001/02/01 13:41:03 US/Eastern

      Geez Louise! I didn't even see the TV/showtune section!! What in Aaron Spelling's name is that all about? Hey Hey Were're not Monkees?? Christian songs to the themes to Beverley Hillbillies, Gilligan's Island, and the Addamms Family? I mean those are some catchy tunes, but come on!

      I think Jesus would be peeved.

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    • Re: My God! Awful Christian Lyrics for Halfway Decent Rock Songs
      by Jack Mingo on 2001/02/01 14:14:30 US/Eastern

      Jeez, the Newbies are awful. Thanks Syrah, Rebecca and Erin. It's definitely worth a listen at high volume...if you want to clear cockroaches and mice out of your house.

      I have to admit that the site is inspiring--I'm almost tempted to submit some god-awful Christian lyrics. First I need an equally awful song to get me started. Let's see: "Fuck tha Police" could become "Prince of tha Peace"; Manson's "The Dope Show" could become "We're all God stars / In the Hope Show..." Gotta think about this for a while. Anybody else interested in trying their hand at this?


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  • Re: My God! Awful Christian Lyrics for Halfway Decent Rock Songs
    by Tonia on 2001/02/01 15:57:04 US/Eastern

    I think that you are wrong ! Christian lyrics to secular songs is great and it is better then listening to that other crap anyway. If you dont like the christian lyrics then dont listen to them and dont mock them - why would you go out of your way to look for somthing you dont like. ,

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    • Re: My God! Awful Christian Lyrics for Halfway Decent Rock Songs
      by nastypoodle on 2001/02/22 11:57:13 US/Eastern

      geeeze tonia - i presume you are a christian by the tone of your post, right?
      well, i'm not, and yeah, i laughed at the fucked up alternate lyrics, they were hideously bad. however what everyone's laughing at here is the fact that the 'rewritten' lyrics are rather pathetic - and i think it's kinder of us 'heathens' to laugh at that than the way christians presume everyone else but them is going to burn in hell or something. lighten up, cos those lyrics are a laugh.

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      • Re: My God! Awful Christian Lyrics for Halfway Dec
        by Jeff James on 2002/07/02 09:31:15 GMT-4

        To what lyrics are you referring? Could you e-mail me directly also? Thanks!

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      • Re: My God! Awful Christian Lyrics for Halfway Decent Rock Songs
        by Kourtney on 2004/04/15 10:28:26 GMT-4

        I do this (ok not these hokey ones) but my band does drift away except the chorus is changed to
        Give me your word lord
        and free my soul
        I wanna stand on your
        rock til i'm old and drift away

        other than that nearly every lyric is the same. We mainly write our on stuff but some stuff is easily fit into another genre we also do stuff like twisted sisters "we're not gonna take it" It really helps because we run a sat. night program that gives teen a free fun and safe place to hang and the other teens love it we have dancing and karaoke and it works don't knoick what you don't know okay.
        And FYI alot of songs you know and might listen to were written from christian songs take for example Sweet Home Up in Heaven a old gospel song which Lynard Skynard adapted to be the famous Sweet Home Alabama or nearly 60 percent of groups like the vaselines who admit openly the often took christian music and rewrote it because it was good it just wasn't mainstream.

        I do think alot the songs you're looking at are overly corny but that's not alkways the case.

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Re: My God! Awful Christian Lyrics for Halfway Decent Rock Songs
by Elizabeth Jarvis on 2001/06/19 08:37:43 GMT-4

You filty heathens I have spent the best part of my life dedicating Christian lyrics to popular tunes and deeply resent your blasphemous remarks. Get back to your hellish popular music and listen to Beelzebub if you dare but do not come back to our website when you stand before the lord on your judgement day. You have been warned!

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  • Re: My God! Awful Christian Lyrics for Halfway Decent Rock Songs
    by Mercie on 2004/10/24 18:39:59 GMT-4

    Remember love? You know, God has to have a sense of humor, but guys, when we talk to people who don't know Jesus...we gotta show love(this is a commandment, not a suggestion) and I'm afraid I myself cringed at "Heaven is Just a Stone's Throw Away"...a serious song about the martyrdom of Stephen. Anyway, good songs or weird, it's our job to show them His love, not push people further away. They mocked His name to His face 2000 years ago...nothing has changed.

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    • Re: My God! Awful Christian Lyrics for Halfway Dec
      by Daakaa on 2005/01/30 09:42:10 US/Eastern

      You are so right! There are people everywhere today...on television, on the internet, in the paper...criticizing people, people like Stephen in the song you were talking about. They talk about love, and peace and harmony, and forget that it wasn't that message that Jesus was crucified for. They talk about Jesus as if they had an iota of a clue as to what he stood for or why he was hated...and get this...they IDENTIFY with Him, like as if they would ever do anything to really stand up for Him and compromise their absolutely warped view of what love really is. Man, thanks for bringing this out. You must really understand the whole meaning behind that "Stone's Throw" song...enough not to be so petty as to look past the humanity and motive of the author and see that his song was just a simple but accurate account of something God intended people to see. Wow, Stephen getting stoned for telling people in a very bold way that they had to accept Christ as their Lord. No wonder he was stoned to death...If he was alive today, guess who would be stoning him? Those touchy, feely, pastel love people...you know, the ones without a clue. Hey, thanks for your posting, and thanks for understanding.

      Daakaa

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    • Re: My God! Awful Christian Lyrics for Halfway Decent Rock Songs
      by Chris Fulk on 2005/03/27 02:40:56 US/Eastern

      When you think about the true meaning of this song it's amazing! Stephen, coming to the end of his life realizes that the life he has led is leading him into the Father's arms. We are told that we will be persecuted. We are just fortunate that God has blessed our country and given us the religious freedom that has freed us from the harshest persecution. That said, imagine standing before God with him knowing the last thing on your mind was reaching heaven and seeing his face. Stephen knew he was dying to this world but he also knew the loving God he served and eternal life was just a stone's throw away.
      p.s. What artist recorded this song? I have heard it several times and I can't place it.

      [ Reply to This ]


 

 
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